Ah, that brief, yet magical period between the end of school and the start of camp . . . For mortals and demigods alike, this is the best time of the year to finally unwind, relax, and embark on that well-earned vacation you’ve been dreaming of for months.
What’s that? You have been too busy to plan an unforgettable getaway? All your friends have already boarded their planes and trains while you’re still at home sitting on your hands? Not to worry. Whether you’re looking for an extended excursion to a faraway land or simply on the hunt for a local hidden gem, we know all the hottest spots to visit this season.
But don’t take our word for it. Check out these online reviews for a few of our favorite destinations from across the Riordanverse.
The Duat Review from Tutuncommon46:
“Part of the reason I decided to pursue an education in magic at the Brooklyn House was to openly travel the Duat, of which I had heard nothing but good things. I thought it would be like a nightclub where all the Egyptian gods and goddesses hang out with interesting-looking spirits and demons.
“Something you should know ahead of time: you’ll find approximately zero party boats on the Sea of Chaos. And you’re not even allowed to step foot in the land of the dead without approval from the bouncer, Shezmu.
“To make matters worse, I dropped my phone in the River of Night and was warned that if I jumped in the water to retrieve it, I would be ‘lost forever.’ Way too many rules. Way too many scary-looking people with scimitars and crocodile heads. And you can’t go anywhere without succumbing to nausea. The only reason I’m giving the Duat 5 stars is because of the banana pudding they serve at the Sunny Acres Assisted-Living Community. Say what you will about Tawaret, but that hippo knows what to do when you’re hungry!”
The Waystation Review by Nets_Fan_832:
“Whenever I find myself in Indianapolis, I always make a point to visit the Waystation. Hemithea and Josephine are SO nice, and I always feel super amazing after donating my time to help those demigods in need.
“Yeah, it’s a little annoying how the layout of the place changes from day to day (I always lose track of where the washroom is), but at the same time, it’s exciting because you never know which famous god or goddess you’re going to run into.
“Never as a volunteer, though. If you see a god or goddess at the Waystation, it’s probably because they’re washed up or going through some hard times. Still, you’ll never have a better opportunity to ask for an autograph. Just make sure they don’t sign it weird, like ‘Lesterpapadapasomething’ or whatever.”
Hebe Jeebies Review from LostIn1979:
“Hebe Jeebies is by far the best arcade in Manhattan. Where else can you play video games from the ‘70s and ‘80s (far superior to today’s offerings) and stuff your face with pizza indefinitely without your family constantly nagging you to stop? The lady who runs this place doesn’t care at all. She’s so cool.
“I love how much this place reminds me that my childhood was utterly perfect. But I’m not sure I like how it also reminds me that each day of my adult life has been abject misery. But my only real complaint is that the wandering chickens are kind of scary and aggressive and I unfortunately left my comfort blankie at home.”
Triple G Ranch Review from SunoftheSouth100:
“My partner and I wanted to spend a relaxing weekend on a remote ranch somewhere in the heart of Texas. After conductin’ a ton of research, we settled on visiting an obscure little place known as the Triple G Ranch. We probably should have double-checked the place online before making the drive.
“The ranch was run by the oddest fella we’ve ever seen. Wide as a barn and three times as ugly. He promised that we could stay for free so long as we ‘fed his horses.’ He also mentioned a few animals in the back of the ranch we weren’t allowed to see. Although, with the size of the eggs, I’m not sure we wanted to. And once we noticed that the water in the tub felt and smelled suspiciously like melted butter, we hightailed it out of there.
“I would tell y’all to avoid the place, but last I heard, the owner passed away from a ‘triple heart attack.’ Whatever that means.”
The Cave of Trophonius Review from SignOfTheTimes_95:
“What a rip-off! So many hoops to jump through just to receive a simple prophecy. No wonder they call this place the Cave of Nightmares. First I had to drink some nasty water from the fountains of Memory and Forgetfulness. Then I had to fight off a bunch of angry bees and snakes. And the worst part is, once I finally got face time with Trophonius himself, his prophecy drove me to the brink of madness! Now the only thing I can do anymore is write negative reviews online! If I’d had to pay for this experience, I totally would have demanded my money back.”
The Island of Ogygia Review from CalypsoStan218:
“I follow a lot of Calypso fan accounts on social media, so I believe me when I tell you that I would go to very great lengths to meet her. Like, you know, blow my life savings on a one-way trip to the remote island of Ogygia,
“Imagine my shock when I discovered that she doesn’t even live here anymore! And without her around, this place is super boring! There’s nothing to do except wait for some big strapping hero to magically wash up on shore, I guess? To add insult to injury, I just learned that Calypso performed at an open mic night at a local club three blocks away from where I live.
“Thankfully, I still somehow get cell service here. But I think I only have enough battery power left to post this review. So, uh. . . help!!!”
We hope these reviews have helped you solidify your upcoming travel plans. Or, if not, perhaps we’ve helped you realize that staying safely within the borders of Camp Half-Blood or Camp Jupiter isn’t as bad as it may seem.
Which location from the Riordanverse would you like to visit? Be sure to let us know!